A Note About Being Kind
Everyone has their blessings and everyone has their curses. That is to say that no matter how beautiful someone’s life may seem on the outside, everyone has their something- issues with their family, job, relationship, friends, themselves…
Sometimes it’s easy to say to someone, “What do you have to be sad about? Your life is amazing. You should be grateful. Don’t complain.” But when you say this to someone who is struggling internally, you’re basically discounting their feelings. You’re not listening to them, rather you’re judging them.
For a lot of us, yes me included, we hide our struggles. We put on a smile everyday and only show the parts of us that we want others to see. We come from a genuine place of positivity and we don’t want to burden people with our problems. And while there is absolutely nothing wrong with this, it can sometimes catch people off guard when we finally do let our walls down. When you finally open up and become vulnerable, you expect the person on the receiving end to give you love, support, and encouragement. But what happens when their response is cold? It causes us to further retreat, building more walls around our hearts, feeling even worse about ourselves.
Just know that we all have our moments of weakness and sometimes we nonverbally cry out for help. We do things hoping that someone will catch it and someone will care enough to help.
But remember that happiness is an inside job. We are always responsible for creating and sustaining our own happiness. No one can make us feel whole and completely 100% happy. That is our job.
But your job as a friend, family member, boyfriend/girlfriend, as a decent citizen is to look out for those cries for help. Look for those signs that your loved one may need a hug or just a moment of your time. Do what you can to relieve their pain and to give them the encouragement they may need. Listen to what they’re saying and ask what you can do to help. You might not be able to do anything, but trust me, your listening ear and sincere concern is enough.
Everyone needs love. Be that light someone may need in their dark time. You never know what someone is going through. Offer your love and support. Listen. Do what you can and help when you can.