How To Stay Positive During Major Life Changes
Changes, changes, changes. So many changes.
This year has been a weird one for me. A lot is happening all at once and I'm not going to lie - the changes have me a little shook up. Within the past six months so much has happened:
I got an awesome new job (thank God!) // I got out of a serious relationship + am newly single (it still sucks but heartbreak has done me good!) // my parents are preparing to move to Texas (I'm an only child!) // my best friend moved across the country (miss you girl!) // and, I'm feeling the growing pains of becoming an adult (gotta get my life all the way together!)
Even though there's a lot of changes, everything is really positive - having a new job relieved major stress about money // being single has allowed me so much more time to focus on my future // even though it will be scary living on my own with my parents far away, it will be a new beginning for all of us // I'm being forced to make new friends // and, I'm learning a lot about myself along the way. . .
Yes, the changes are all positive, BUT (it's a big but), I can't help but feel like my world is turning upside down. Why? Because I feel like I'm being forced into adulthood, for one, and everything is happening so darn fast!
If I can be completely honest, there are times when the changes become so overwhelming that I cry. Not just a little sniffle cry, oh no - I'm talking about a full on, overly dramatic Kim Kardashian face cry (google it). I know what you may be thinking: why the heck are you crying if all the changes are positive, girl?
Simply because, well, I'm afraid. I'm afraid because I'm leaving the past behind and discovering a new life. Change is extremely uncomfortable and it takes an incredible amount of courage to accept change and let go of what was.
Now, I can sit in my room and whimper 24/7 about how my life is changing or I can get a stiff upper lip and deal with these changes the right way. Yeah, I'm choosing the latter. Here's how:
When there's major life changes happening around you and to you, it's so incredibly easy to focus on what you no longer have. Instead, make sure you're giving continuous gratitude for what you do have. When I got my new job, I found myself complaining a lot because I no longer had as much time to blog and pursue my other passions. I stopped myself real quick because I realized what a blessing it was to have found a job that I actually liked and reminded myself that anything is possible - I just have to use my time wisely and be thankful for my journey.
FOCUS ON YOU
You may not be able to control what's going on around you, but you can control you. It's easy to get caught up in the feelings of anxiety and insecurity but if you let those feelings consume you, you will never be able to make progress. For a long time after my breakup, I focused on what went wrong, how I could fix it, and how lonely I felt. Being single was a hard adjustment, but I learned to switch my focus to myself - what can I do to improve my well being, my future, and my happiness. I've been the happiest I've ever been since I started to focus on me! :)
FIND YOUR INNER ZEN
This is a biggie! With change comes a flood of emotions - stress, anxiety, depression, sadness, anger, confusion, guilt. I cannot emphasize enough how extremely important it is to find peace within yourself. Do not allow the outside world and other people to have control over your inner peace. You must find a way to go through life accepting the changes that are happening, but do not internalize them! At the end of the day, you are still beautiful you no matter what.
Find your calm. Find your peace. Find your zen.
REMIND YOURSELF THAT THIS IS TEMPORARY
There are very few things that are permanent in life. Think of changes as a means to another means. This is not your forever, it's just the path you have to take in order to get to something better. Remind yourself constantly that things will settle and the discomfort you are currently experiencing will go away. Have patience. Have faith.
STAY CONNECTED TO THE ONES YOU FEEL MOST CONNECTED TO
Now this is the #LifeLesson that took me the longest to learn (and maybe a counseling session or two). When your life is changing for the better, sometimes you have to leave friends behind that no longer serve a purpose. As your life and you yourself elevate, there will be people who don't understand and will try to bring you down. Learn to disconnect from anyone who does not make a positive impact in your life but stay close to the ones who support you fully and love you unconditionally. These are the ones who deserve your time and energy. Even though you may be separated by oceans and land, like one of my best friends and I are now, make time to catch up and connect.
Life will change, that's inevitable. There will be changes you're able to control, and there will even be more changes that are totally out of your hands. What's important is that we have a positive mind + spirit as we go through these life changes.
What do you do to deal with major changes in your life? I would love to know! Leave me any tips + tricks you may have in the comment section down below :)